merry christmas, everybody!

i guess that about sums it up.

hope everyone has a terrific day, with or without snow.

lifehouse

"when the world keeps spinning round,
my world's upside-down.
you and i wouldn't change a thing."

those lyrics don't relate to me much right now, but i still love that song.

how is everybody's break going so far?

one down, two to go

and then everybody's home free!

i'm at school right now. i just finished the engineering exam (which i got an "a" on despite the fact that i completely effed up one of the SIX questions), and i was going to go to the bank but i forgot my deposit slip.

talk to a seventh grader online sometime. it'll surprise you just how much you were like that only a short time ago.

according to my doctor, i can hear and am not anemic. i got a sparkly bandaid and a lollipop, too. oh, the benefits of being the oldest patient in a pediatric ward.

i'm not up to much else today besides studying and no good.

that's all folks!
(erin: yes, that was for you.)

let the exams begin!

i exempted first period, so i went out to breakfast with amber, christy, and kelly. it was very cold and blueberry.

after school, i did some mandatory last-minute shopping before alicia and i met up at my house and went out to paint ceramics.

i sent in my uf acceptance money (the first payment of many) or whatever it's officially called. i realize, also, that i need to find a new e-mail address, as the one i have is no longer free for offline users.

gay.

so tonight i'm looking forward to an amc movie, whatever happens to be on. electric blanket will cuddle with me, since no one else will.

tomorrow: sleep and studying.

that's that.

bunko!

last night i went over to christy's after work. it was nice doing something with just the girls. hopefully we'll have another sleepover sometime over break.

this week's schedule:

• monday: last real day of school.
• tuesday: no first period exam. dinky 30-minute classes until 2:45.
• wednesday: no exams. passport picture around 10:30 am, then who really cares?
• thursday: fourth period exam, then who really cares? studying for friday somewhere in there.
• friday: sixth and seventh period exams. probably out afterwards to celebrate the end of the semester. then work from 5 pm to about 10 pm. maybe out again, maybe not.
• saturday: work from 8 am to 5 pm. saturated with anticipation.

i used bullets for the first time in here. i feel free.

double spaced. no more "enter, enter." pampering of the pinky.

that was almost haiku-esque.

time to pet my kitties.

the heavens parted. a beam of light shone down through the disappearing clouds as the angels sang:

"Congratulations! Your application to the University of Florida for the 2005 FALL term has been approved. You will receive official notification and additional materials in the mail. We look forward to seeing you on campus in the very near future!"

oh, and "haaaaalleluja! haaaalleluja! halleluja! halleluja! hallEEluja!"

babbitt!

"laughing at ourselves, thinking life's not fair..."

i know i've been saying that i can't wait to get out of here, but the truth is that there are a few things i will really miss.

there won't be any sunday drives to clear my head for the start of the new week. there won't be any mommies or daddies to kiss goodnight, and there won't be any old flames you can run into or hear about when your friends run into them.

there won't be kitties on your bed and there won't be neighbors cutting your lawn. there won't be your best friend living right around the corner, and there won't be a whole house to come home to every day.

there won't be seven class periods and the time in between them. club days will be no more, and ap classes become college classes.

there won't be any vitamin c singing your anthem tonight when you stop to think about just how long this chapter is that you're concluding.

even though it's only the end of the first semester, the second will pass just as quickly.

here's to the class of 2005. make the best of everything.

he knows not where he's going to.

what a restful weekend.

not.

by the end of the day, i will have completed an absolutely massive amount of work. why?, you ask. because the end of the semester is upon us, and every single teacher thought it would be cute to assign a project, an exam review, an essay, or an experiment (or some variation or combination of the mentioned headaches).

wow, gaither staff. you are SO funny.

in all honesty, i'm already done with most of it. what's getting me is the friday deadline for experimentation on my engineering project, mainly because i may have to secretly tweak the date and make it december twentieth instead of the tenth.

break is officially over. back to work.

beep, beep! beep, beep! yeah!

december everywhere

the semester is practically over, though it seems like it was july only a week ago.

but i'm certainly not too nostalgic, as this summer is going to be, hands-down, the best summer ever.

1. where ever.
still haven't decided quite where to go for my all-expenses-paid trip, but who cares? i'm going there, right?

2. myrtle beach.
of course, there are details that have to be worked out and i'm the newbie, but who cares? it's still freaking myrtle the turtle beach.

3. road trip (?).
questionable. probably won't happen, come to think of it, but i'd still like to think that it will.

4. steinmart who?
since i'm going to be doing a lot of traveling and haning out with friends one last time before we have our final hurrah and shove off to the four corners of florida, i won't have much time to spend working at stein-stein. perhaps i just may quit instead of asking for one week off every other week.

5. that's it.

so trip, trip, probably-won't-happen trip, and no more job. that's my idea of a fanFREAKINGtastic summer, alright.

yo-yo's roomies

i can't say that i remember much of what happened today. it's not like i wasn't there, but i honestly don't remember. just "make a wish" bear in psych and dream's special pillow.

man, am i tired.

the project of absolute crap is working somewhat. the data cannot be interpreted, as it is not accurate to what it SHOULD be, but hey - i have numbers, so who really cares how right they are?

not me, and i certainly won't give it two thoughts ten days from now when something hopefully very beautiful arrives in the mailbox declaring how i will or will not spend the next four years of my life.

oh well. if i don't get in, i'll go do something stupid instead of go to college, like become a "missionary" or join the "coast guard," traveling the "world."

i don't think it would be that bad. i mean, i could just not go to college, disappoint my parents, and hold a series of odd yet incredibly gratifying jobs that reward me with pretty little paychecks for the rest of my life. not that i want to be a terri or anything, but i wouldn't mind not trudging through an absolute minimum of four more years of education.

how can uf refuse an offer like that?

i need to get out of here. too many smells.

pictures are fun for everyone.

it's going to be one of those homework sundays.

i got a digital camera yesterday. that was fun. i'm still learning how to use it, but it's pretty self-explanitory so far.

um. go uf. dragonball z for life.

[title]

the sculptor


i want to be a model.
i want to show the strength of my maker.
mold me in your hands
and do what you feel you need to do -
what you want to do,
even -
to make me perfect
every time you look at me.
dream
and make me what you dream;
love
and make me what you love.
you keep your hands
so full of blood and breath
and soon
clay becomes woman
who exists solely for you.

you make your art -
life flowing from your fingers
like waterfalls;
your masterpiece is me.

third time's the charm.

after two dramatized attempts, i find myself on my third draft.

plain and simple, things are pretty messed up, but there isn't exactly much i can do to help fix them and make things better. people will do what they want to do, and impulse is at the heart of many mistakes.

i've come to realize that people fuck up a lot, even the ones who teach you how not to fuck up. some people feel resentment, some never do. i'm sure that many things factor into each circumstance, but sometimes it's flat-out wrong to feel completely normal.

i know i'm being judgemental and i also know that i'm not one to judge where guilt is concerned, but it seems to me that a lot of people deserve better.

ckocko mario kart

i have received a letter from my aunt sue entitling me to a trip to pretty much anywhere. i think i'm going to shoot for atlantis.

i didn't do anything of much interest this weekend, so this is the part where i make things up:

friday after work i went to see i heart huckabees with a certain tortuga. we then came back to my house where he played my guitar for a little while and then left around one. how charming.

today i spent the morning shopping, but spending the money of others. i worked all afternoon, and i'm going out to a concert later tonight. it's probably going to be a local band or something. i mean, i can only guess because it's a surprise christmas present. ooh la la.

so now that i'm done lying, i'll go.

tootsi.

certified twenty. yeah.

how bad do you want a song to be written for you and played in front of a grandoise audience?

me too.

so, what have we learned today? mr. psychologist is afraid for sweeney ("there's moses in my eye!") and vocational rehabilitation is not a desirable career for anyone ever.

schwing.

i can't wait for the holidays. i'm pretty much done with christmas shopping. now it's time to download music from the nutcracker and enjoy for the next month and a half.

dear november,

be cold.

love,
maggie.

chicago corner

crazy night that began with soccer and ended in scarf hilarity.

tomorrow morning i'm picking out a digital camera for christmas, and then running around tampa doing my science project. bill currie ford is probably my new best friend.

"i was spinning into a dark hole
when javatropolis saved my soul."

candy love

do you guys identify with that beat?

i love this song.

gonna get back to basics.
guess i'll start it up again.
i'm falling from the ceiling;
you're falling from the sky now and then.
maybe you were shot down in pieces;
maybe i slipped in between.
but we were gonna be the wildest people they ever hoped to see -
just you and me.
so why'd you come home to this sleepless town?
it's a lifetime commitment
recovering the satellites.
all anybody really wants to know is
when you gonna come down.
your mother recognizes all your desperate displays
and she watches as her babies drift violently away
'til they see themselves in telescopes.
do you see yourself in me?
we're such crazy babies, little monkey;
we're so fucked up, you and me.
so why'd you come home to this faithless town,
where we make a lifetime commitment
to recovering the satellites?
and all anybody really wants to know is
when are you gonna come down.
she sees shooting stars and comet tails.
she's got heaven in her eyes.
she says i don't need to be an angel,
but i'm nothing if i'm not this high.
but we only stay in orbit
for a moment of time,
and then you're everybody's satellite;
i wish that you were mine.
so why'd you come home to this angel's town?
it's a lifetime decision
recovering the satellites.
everybody really knows for sure
that you're gonna come down,
that you're gonna come down.

'bama it all to hell.

"and ill hang around as long as you will let me,
and i never minded standin' in the rain.
you dont have to call me darlin', darlin';
you never even call me by name."

i miss lawa.